The Summer Solstice, June 21, is the longest day of the year. While we enjoy the extra hours of daylight, that light also sheds hope in a nationwide effort to end Alzheimer’s disease, the most common form of dementia. Longest Day Granby is doing its part on June 21.
Corinne Dickerson, an East Granby resident, has joined the cause to honor her late husband who lived with Alzheimer’s for many years. Reflecting on her experience as a caregiver to a spouse living with Alzheimer’s disease, Corinne hopes that her story provides validation and hope to people and caregivers currently navigating the labyrinth created by this disease.
Jerry and Corinne met at the Hartford lnsurance Group in 1972. Prior to their marriage in 1973, Jerry served 27 years in the United States Marine Corps, retiring as a Lt. Colonel. When Jerry changed jobs, the couple moved to Syracuse. However, retirement brought them back to Connecticut. They enjoyed retirement, traveling to various destinations. Bora Bora was a favorite. Corinne recalls, “He always wanted to go there. We also traveled to so many places in this great country.”
When they were not traveling, Corinne continued employment at Granby’s Town Hall. Jerry helped co-found Granby’s AARP Tax Service, which is still offered at the Granby Senior Center.
When did you realize Jerry had a cognitive problem?
“Slowly, things started to fall apart. ln his mid-seventies, he started forgetting things and people from his past. He couldn’t balance his checkbook. He became disoriented once during a shopping trip. I went into the store for a few minutes. When I came back, he was gone. Jerry crossed a very busy Route 5 in East Windsor to get to Wendy’s. A woman called the police and he was taken to the hospital. He then started to wander at home. He would just start out the door and head down the street!”
Where did you find help in learning how to manage his needs?
“l went to lots of informational talks given at an assisted living facility. I read some books. His doctor referred him to a geriatric specialist in Farmington. That’s where he was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s disease. We hired a wonderful caregiver named Paul, who connected really well with Jerry. We also had good luck with a home health aide who taught us about the proper skin creams to use. An equipment company also helped to provide door ramps and a hoyer lift when those were needed.”
Please share a few of the more challenging parts of caregiving.
“We had a hard time getting a diagnosis. A lot of internists don’t want to diagnose it. lt took a while to finally get to the specialist. Then there is always the guilt. But you know, that’s really too bad. Because the person would not want you to feel guilty. We did all we could to keep Jerry home. We tried an adult day center, but that didn’t work well for him. Combative behaviors became more challenging. Jerry had a brief stay at a rehabilitation facility. People living with this disease need an advocate, and I was Jerry’s. lt’s a tough job. You know the person better than the staff. I had to push for tests, physical therapy, and other things. Jerry’s frequent bladder infections ended up being related to bladder cancer.”
Are there recommendations you would share with other caregivers?
“l’ve learned some tips and tricks along the way. For example: we put a lock high up on the door, because they don’t look up. That kept him safe. Jerry loved music. We found that he not only enjoyed it, but it really calmed him down. Our dog Kenzie was also a comfort. She was often found sitting in Jerry’s lap. lt’s important to realize that even though they are not the same person, YOU are that person’s world. We just kept telling Jerry how much we loved him. It is terrible to watch your husband deteriorate before your eyes and know there is nothing you can do to stop it: except to give him a lot of love and comfort.”
ls there anything else you would like to share?
“We used to say that a true love story has no ending. He kissed me every day and told me that he loved me…right until the end. He died during a fireworks display in Hartford. I’d like to think that was a sign of the heavens getting ready for him…”
All are invited to support Longest Day Granby, a local fundraiser on June 21, from 4:30 to 8:30 p.m. The event will be held on the lawn of South Church Granby (on Rte. 10). ln the event of rain, the event will move indoors at First Church Granby (on Rte. 189). There will be food trucks, fun, wellness activities, vendors, raffles and a gentle yoga class. Proceeds will benefit The Alzheimer’s Association in their mission to support both people and families living with dementia as well as research to find more effective treatments and a cure.
To volunteer at the event, become a vendor, or donate a raffle item, please contact Heather Dobbert at 860-819-1528 or heatherdobbert@gmail.com
